Sometimes the thought that my children’s learning and growth, in all aspects of life, ultimately depends on my husband and I can be overwhelming. Worry and doubt creep in that we are not doing enough to help our children grow. I have had to take a step back many times in life and remind myself that eventually the load won’t be as heavy. One day they will be more independent in their learning and growth. One day our hard work will pay off as they are able to thrive without us. Though, getting there can seem like an uphill battle. Over the years I have found 4 things that I believe, if taught, can have some of the best, long-lasting growth for our children.

1. Mistakes Help Us Grow

Beginning with one we talk about all the time in our family: mistakes. Mistakes help you grow. Changing our idea of what mistakes are can make a big difference in our abilities to overcome them. When most people think of mistakes, they think of failures. You tried to do something, you messed up, and so you failed. But what if we thought of mistakes as things that help us, rather than hinder us? As we try things over and over, parts of our brain change, and it actually gets smarter with each attempt. Just like the more we work our physical body, the stronger and more skillful it gets. Practicing something multiple times, trying again after a mistake, and not giving up allows for growth. If your child is struggling in a certain development area, perhaps handwriting or social gatherings, remind them (and yourself) that the more they try, the stronger that skill will grow within them. Giving our children continuous opportunities to try out different skill building activities will help them grow in ways we hadn’t imagined before!

2. Giving Our Best Effort

You have to give your best effort! My oldest and I talk about this time and time again. I know one day the things he is struggling with will become second nature and he’ll forget he ever had a hard time with them before. Implementing the idea that mistakes help us grow is important, as we discussed. But if your child isn’t giving their best effort, it’s going to take a lot longer for skills to develop. That doesn’t mean they have to be perfect in their attempts. They just need to give the best they can in that moment, and that might not look like it did the day before. We all have times when we are on our A-game and times we are in a funk, kids especially have these moments. So, remind your kiddo to give the best effort they can give right then and applaud their attempt and successes!

3. Learning to Love Learning

Does your kiddo have a love for learning? One of the things I’ve enjoyed most about homeschooling my kids is watching their desire to learn grow. We all have an inquisitive mind to some degree and want to seek out new concepts and information. There is a difference though, between having an inquisitive mind and love of learning, and that is the desire to deepen that information and hold on to it. When you have a love for learning there is true excitement and wonder as you search through available resources just to get that last ounce of knowledge. Allowing our children to explore, discover, search, and share what they have learned can all help them develop a love of learning. Of course, we must teach things that may not always interest them. But giving them some freedom after those lessons to dive into their interests is a great way to encourage a love of learning.

4. Believing in Ourselves

I believe all children should believe in themselves, but not all of them do. So when my third oldest showed signs that he didn’t believe in himself, I racked my brain and searched the internet on how to help him. A few things that have helped him is starting our mornings off with affirmations. He has to tell me at least three things about himself and those can range from things he is good at, things he loves about himself, or even who he is. Sometimes he rattles off 5-6 quick as can be and walks off confidently. Other times he struggles to even squeak out one. But as we have worked on this I can see seeds of belief being planted in his mind and heart. Another thing I do is to make a point to tell him he can do hard things, especially in those moments when he is feeling doubt. I make sure he knows that even though it is hard, even though he may not have gotten it the first time, he can do hard things. One other thing I do is to always point out the things he has done well. Whether that is in a school lesson, art project, chore, or while playing with others. It helps him see all the things he is good at, all the things he is doing right. Little by little we can help build our children up and instill thoughts of belief in them.

Children are unique and so different from one another. They have their own set of struggles and strengths. Even with these differences, these 4 areas can help them each become amazing little humans and will help them in years to come. Instilling these thoughts and practices into your child will have lasting benefits in all areas of growth!

Your Homework:

What’s a homeschool blog without any homework?

• What’s one way you can help your kids grow. (We listed four, but just pick one!)
• What will be your action plan to help them in this area?